Life’s twists and turns can be scarier than any rollercoaster ride out there. Without warning, a perfectly fine—even good—life can take a turn for the worse. Whether you are faced with a lost job, failed health, or personal rejection, such a blow can knock you off your feet. And you might find it almost impossible to get up, never mind feel good about moving on. But, with time, effort, and the proper perspective, you can get yourself up and back on a good path.
The real problem when things go bad – Your sense of self-worth
The real problem in situations that seem to pull the rug out from under you is that they affect your whole sense of self.
Without a sense of self-worth, people often defensively place the blame for problems outside of themselves. This kind of defensive response can backfire, leading people to remain stuck in bad situations or destructive patterns of behavior. They might feel the need to protect himself or herself by viewing colleagues as highly critical. And, in such a hostile work environment, they will probably be more defensive and have tense interactions with those colleagues. Whatever the circumstance, externalizing blame won’t help you make changes to improve yourself or your situation.
How to deal with the bad time
Whereas problems that cause less distress don’t feel good, they still allow you appreciate other positive aspects of yourself; which strengthens your sense of self-worth. This happens naturally because people are motivated to feel good about themselves.
1. Self-affirmations
These are statements you make to yourself that affirm your strengths in some areas when you are struggling in other areas. With improved self-esteem, you would be more likely to address the problem at hand in an effective, nondefensive way.
2. Not to turn a critical eye against yourself
Those who are inclined toward high standards often become critical of themselves and their performance. So, when faced with a situation that cannot be realistically overcome, they frequently keep pushing themselves even as they become more and more distraught about their abilities and their value.
So, when faced with adversity, it is important not to turn a critical eye to others or yourself. Instead, choose to remember positives about you that are based on an honest assessment of your strengths.
Then, with self-affirmations, practice, and effort, you can learn to regain your sense of worth and become more resilient; moving on more easily from major setbacks to new exciting life challenges.